How normal is dropping in? Dad would drop in unannounced on friends, family, and acquaintances. He'd revel in surprise - dropping in on an acquaintance or family member who least expected a VW van with Dad and his family to roll up to their doorstep. Dropping in was a two-way street though, he'd also whole-heartedly welcome people who would drop in on us. Growing up as a kid, I thought this was normal - I thought everyone did this.
We'd travel a lot. I'd lived in more than one house for every year of my life by the time I was 12, so there was the moving house kind of travel. On top of that there was the summer travel, when we'd be off so Dad could complete summer school, or so we could connect with family. We never stayed in hotels, so it was either camping, or sleeping in the basement of some unsuspecting host.
Dad would become impishly happy in the hours and minutes prior to surprising someone. Sometimes it was a churchfellow who'd moved and given Dad their new address saying "if you're ever in the area, drop by!" Or a workfellow, like another teacher. Or a childhood friend. This happened many times. I can count at least a half dozen clear memories from when I was small of dropping in and staying overnight before moving on and pretty much never seeing those hosts again.
To be fair, sometimes Dad had called ahead, but he loved to under-promise and over-deliver - in other words, he loved to surprise you by showing up a day early. So he's say "we should be there Saturday night" and then Dad would gleefully show up on a Friday night. What a rebel.
I want to share with you a couple special memories I have about dropping in on Dad.
In the first memory, I was 18 or 19 and was living in Vancouver. For some reason I now forget, I'd arrived in Victoria super early in the morning, and I knew Dad would just be getting up. I also knew he left his doors unlocked. So I snuck in - gleefully I might add - and discovered he was in the shower. Perfect. So I hid outside the door, and when he opened it I leapt out at him like an angry bear. Totally worth it. I remember him grinning ear to ear so pleased I was there (after the shock and adrenaline rush had subsided of course).
A few years later Dad was living in Duncan. I happened to be in town, helping the Cowichan Tribes with their pitch to host the North American Indigenous Games. The pitch went late, and a couple of the out-of-town celebrities that the Tribes had hired to help with the presentation ended up being locked out of their Hotel. I heard about it, and feeling out of options, dropped by Dad's house with the out-of-towners who needed a place to sleep. I had to wake Dad up. Despite the tiredness and surprise, Dad was super happy and welcoming, kind of shocking the guests with his kindness, and perhaps his bare-chested typical lack of clothing ;)
We woke up the next morning, and Dad had cooked us a big breakfast feast. I remember the guests looking at me, shocked that he'd done so much. In that moment I felt like a wealthy guy, as they looked at me like I was the luckiest to have such a welcoming, giving Dad.
I inherited Dad's welcoming - we had a record number of visitors and drop-ins this year at our farm - and I love to cook for masses. I didn't take on the dropping in part. Poor planning? Sometimes, yea, that's me. I don't drop in unnounced anymore though. It's too nerve-wracking, and I'm not bombastic enough to make myself welcome the way Dad seemed to be able to.
As I grew up into an adult, it gradually dawned on me how abnormal Dad's dropping in behaviour was. It really isn't done. But Dad was abnormal in many ways - he was generous to a fault. He got to know his neighbours no matter where we lived. And his doors were literally always open to weary travellers and other guests.
Did Dad ever drop in on you and surprise you? I'd love to hear about it.