It's been over a year since Dad died and we had his funeral and memorial song circle and hang out. I thought I'd remember more of the condolences, but after a year only a few memories and stories told remain. Here they are:
- A long line of people shook my hand after the funeral, and I remember what a bright sweet energetic elderly lady said. She was dressed mostly in white, and seemed about half my size. She stepped up and grasped my hand warmly and gave me a huge smile. "This is the BEST FUNERAL I've EVER been to!" she exclaimed cheerily. "And your Eulogy was the BEST!" Then she leaned in, still holding my hand with both of hers, and said with a grin "... and trust me, I've been to a LOT of funerals! Yours was the best!" Her full on smile and cheer really made an impression amongst the somber handshakes and hugs and half-hugs.
- A nervous musician who came to the music circle afterwards. He approached me and said he didn't really know my dad well but he wanted to come because of something amazing my dad did. He said that he knew of someone suicidal in the music scene who had become a recluse. Dad wrote this person a positive personal post card every day for months until the person made contact and re-emerged. According to him, Dad had gone out of his way to save a stranger's life. It still brings me tears, and reminds me of the loving postcards I would occasionally get from him the last couple of years.
- A teacher who told me that dad used to cook big pancake and waffle breakfasts for his students, using griddles that he's fixed or restored himself and with students. He said dad made a big impression on him as a teacher and that he'd never seen that before.
- A musician who I met outside, who said he hardly knew dad, and got to know him just months before he died. He said Dad had heard he was having trouble with renovations, so he came by with tools and asked if he could take a look. He said he was at wits end, and two hired professionals had both tried but been unable to fix his basement wiring, leaving him with part done jobs and his electrical not working. Dad came in to his basement, after a few minutes of looking around said "I see exactly what happened here. I will fix it." Dad went by every day for a week until he got the job done - and apparently didn't ask for a dime to do it.
It is still hard to believe that he's gone and has left us. I wish I'd been able to record more of your stories to my memory that day, but it was quite overwhelming. For me I miss my Dad, a loving, wise man who helped me feel better about myself every time I talked to him or felt his hugs. He still inspires me when I think back to these stories of things he did to brighten up other people's lives.
-jb